i dont get why when a baby is born like ON THE DAY people are already like “oh they look just like their father/mother” um have you even seen babies they all look the same.
(via laughcentre)
So this one day I was walking down the street, and then it hit me. The empty hole in my heart could be filled only by one thing...my blog. I'm here to make you laugh, or cry: whichever's most amusing at the time but just do something. Oh yeah and my name's Nick, but that's not important
i dont get why when a baby is born like ON THE DAY people are already like “oh they look just like their father/mother” um have you even seen babies they all look the same.
(via laughcentre)
(via lolzpicx)

1. push yourself to get up before the rest of the world - start with 7am, then 6am, then 5:30am. go to the nearest hill with a big coat and a scarf and watch the sun rise.
2. push yourself to fall asleep earlier - start with 11pm, then 10pm, then 9pm. wake up in the morning feeling re-energized and comfortable.
3. erase processed food from your diet. start with no lollies, chips, biscuits, then erase pasta, rice, cereal, then bread. use the rule that if a child couldn’t identify what was in it, you don’t eat it.
4. get into the habit of cooking yourself a beautiful breakfast. fry tomatoes and mushrooms in real butter and garlic, fry an egg, slice up a fresh avocado and squirt way too much lemon on it. sit and eat it and do nothing else.
5. stretch. start by reaching for the sky as hard as you can, then trying to touch your toes. roll your head. stretch your fingers. stretch everything.
6. buy a 1L water bottle. start with pushing yourself to drink the whole thing in a day, then try drinking it twice.
7. buy a beautiful diary and a beautiful black pen. write down everything you do, including dinner dates, appointments, assignments, coffees, what you need to do that day. no detail is too small.
8. strip your bed of your sheets and empty your underwear draw into the washing machine. put a massive scoop of scented fabric softener in there and wash. make your bed in full.
9. organise your room. fold all your clothes (and bag what you don’t want), clean your mirror, your laptop, vacuum the floor. light a beautiful candle.
10. have a luxurious shower with your favourite music playing. wash your hair, scrub your body, brush your teeth. lather your whole body in moisturiser, get familiar with the part between your toes, your inner thighs, the back of your neck.
11. push yourself to go for a walk. take your headphones, go to the beach and walk. smile at strangers walking the other way and be surprised how many smile back. bring your dog and observe the dog’s behaviour. realise you can learn from your dog.
12. message old friends with personal jokes. reminisce. suggest a catch up soon, even if you don’t follow through. push yourself to follow through.
14. think long and hard about what interests you. crime? sex? boarding school? long-forgotten romance etiquette? find a book about it and read it. there is a book about literally everything.
15. become the person you would ideally fall in love with. let cars merge into your lane when driving. pay double for parking tickets and leave a second one in the machine. stick your tongue out at babies. compliment people on their cute clothes. challenge yourself to not ridicule anyone for a whole day. then two. then a week. walk with a straight posture. look people in the eye. ask people about their story. talk to acquaintances so they become friends.
16. lie in the sunshine. daydream about the life you would lead if failure wasn’t a thing. open your eyes. take small steps to make it happen for you.
Roses are white
nightlock is blue
it’s called Catching Fire
not Hunger Games 2
my 6 year old brother has been crying for the past 20 minutes because my parents didn’t invite him to their wedding 19 years ago
so when do you think demi lovato’s gonna become a full lovato
i saw a chameleon today so i guess it was a pretty shitty chameleon
(via laughcentre)
The kiwi bird

You know what I just realized? Patrick killed people.
Patrick killed a lot of people.
and then things got unholy
this is an episode of hannibal
(via that-gif-person)

man salads are the best thing in the world
Man, salads
no man salads
(via laughcentre)
vwhy:
WHAT TEAM
catwild
getcha game in the head
time what it is
it on bet
flyin we’re, soarin
top to the bop
(via fuckyeahloldemort)
when you find a shirt you really like and wear it a couple times and it starts doing
the thing
(via fuckyeahloldemort)